Writing this chapter requires me to be really really me. Mercy comes along my bitterly regret. Love is still with me while thinking of the words to explain what is runing in my mind lately. Having said that, my mind, body and soul having their own party. Party of rebel and hatred.
Dear F Word,
I am now in a fullboard attention of this organization. Part of my body in and both feet are out. Not even a tiny step are made to be actually step-in and appreciate the true value. As all my friends knew and aknowledgel; i am the man with milions dreams. Inspired through my hard times, painful moments and sweetest victory for 25 years.
My childhood was awesome. No words can eventually describe what i had experience. Life is such a fun when we were young. Tears rewarded with gifts and pleasure. Toys and machines are the instrument to make the melody of tears become a smile. As my age become more, i learned that it is more that fun.
Its a battle to be able to undertake the burden of being a boy. Education is the huge part of my pie. Others are Sports, fun, crazy and freaky. During that teenage era, i was the mutant, nobel one. I admit that i have no interest in education. But things change when we moved to Kuala Lumpur. I noticed that F word did major effords to help me get into a good institution. So i change me objective of my life.
I do what is good. What F word wants me to be in flying colours. I do it really good. But one thing in life, within myself; i don't like people to ask me questions about what happen today, what's is your result, how was your friends; are they good. and blah blah blah....
It resulted to a masive amount of confusion and stress. Thus, it effected to my final exam of my school's exams. Nevertheless, once get into the higher leaning institution, i can be my own. I do what is good for me and my future. It was proven and acctually graduate with points that i personally can be proud of.
Reason for me to be a successful person, top gun in the industry and the canon that blows people's mind is because I WANT TO CHANGE MY FUTURE. I noticed that i can not be the man be working without anybody appreciate and noted on my ability to take any resposiblities. I went through a very hard times. i don't want the same thing happen to myfamily and my own in years to come.
Shits come and go. But will never stop to make some ache in me.
I listen to your advise. I take your words. I do whats good. I make you proud of nothing comes from me. I measure the importance of money and stats of my future. To be able to live in my dreams. The dreams that i imagines since i was in the early 20s...Yupe.
But nothing comes near. I can't event smell and heard the miracle coming. As the wise man said; There are Two Ways to Live your Life. One is Though Nothing is a Miracle. Other is Though Everything is Miracle.
And, yeah...whateverLAH. leave it to the hands of God Almighty. I can't ask anymore.
I hope one day...that one day to change my life back to something i can be proud of. Something to show, to tell a story and to cherish with my kids later.
I want my name to be known for the goodwill and campaign.
(END)
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